Friday, April 17, 2009

Something I think about....

A December 2008 Easter Seals and MassMutual study, Living with Autism, found of parents having children with autism:

74% fear their children won't have enough financial support after the parents die

52% say caring for their children drains the family's current financial resources

Nearly 80% are extremely or very concerned about their children's independence as adults

14% feel that their children will be able to make life decisions

17% think their children will make friends"

All parents worry about their children's future, but for parents who have children with autism, these worries may never disappear," said John Chandler, senior vice president and chief marketing officer of MassMutual's U. S. Insurance Group, "that's why MassMutual has sponsored a new research study focused on the challenges of families living with Autism Spectrum Disorders
."


This is not ment to be a downer post but this is part of my reality and being a momma to my special little guy. The following are my thought.
I think all parents think about stuff like this but when you have a special needs child you really think about this stuff and often. Louis and I have been talking about this lately what if something were to happen to me or both of us? Who would take care of Mav and the girls?Who would be able to do what we do for Mav? because Right now people think and say they can handle it but seriously once I'm gone you can't just pick up the phone and say hey Mav needs momma, you need to come get him I don't know what to do, how do I handle or take care of him Mandy?I'm scared that if something were to happen to me that things would be very hard for Mav and those that would be caring for him. Mav and I have a bond like no other its hard to put into words I know him better then anyone else.Like Louis has said no one could take care of Mav the way I do they wouldn't know how to.We haven't figured this out yet.I know that the good Lord has a plan for me and its to be Mav's momma and I probably shouldn't worry about this because we have many many many years ahead. Alrighty have a great day!!
Off to spend time with my fam its my Birthday weekend woohoo!I have a special treat for tomorrows post so be sure to check it out.

3 comments:

Lisa said...

Firstly, Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday dear Mandy! Happy Birthday to you! Now, be glad that came to you via the net...I SUCK at singing!

I can't leave without commenting on the concerns you wrote about. I was actually talking today about how hard it was to write our will when our children were younger. The hard part being who would take the kids. I agonized over this. I cried. I fought with my ex. I changed my mind 50,000 times. No one ever seemed right. Add your extra special boy to that worry and MAN that has got to be one hard topic. But you are right to focus on the fact that God has a plan. He blessed you and Mav with the gift of each other. And he will honor that gift. Just pray for guidance (as I'm sure you do) and leave it in His hands. I will say an extra prayer for you. Love you girl!

Now go have a Happy Birthday!

Heather Landry said...

Happy Birthday Mandy! My daughter turned 5 today, and I turned 29 on the 10th. April birthdays rock! I hope you get everything you've dreamed of and more.

My husband and I ended up setting up a special needs trust for our girls, and a very specific will. We even met with an estate planner. My sister in law will get our kids (After much arguing and discussion.) with my mother and father in law having to sign off on all major purchases out of their trust funds. I'm not saying we're rich or anything at all, but we had to make sure that our estate didn't impact their services in the future. Medical care, and other things. You might want to consider meeting with an estate planner to discuss your concerns. I feel SO much better now that it's all done, even though at the time it was really difficult to decide. I really had to think who could handle our special needs children the best. I don't think this was a downer post at all. Just what was on your mind! Hugs.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Two of my three adult childern are autistic (38, 31, and 30). The oldest is most affected. He lives somewhat independently. The other, much less affected, is married. Bad marriage, many life problems (dui, long periods of unemployment). Point of this is that the problems don't go away. My mistake has been not making sure I live a full life. Raise them the best you can but take care of you.